Works are by yours truly; Annsley.
Take it or LEAVE it. Love it then STAY.
NOW PLAYING : XXXX by XXXX
MyCompositions: Depression
Sunday, November 13, 2005
back. i'm back again. amath don't appeal to me and it never had. or maybe it had, but just once upon a time, on a rare blue moon. here's something i gave myself to accomplish lest i start whining. AGAIN.
Darkness loomed ahead as he, as usual, continued his journey back home. Everyday was merely a routine, a routine well ingrained in his system that he lived his life as a monotonous robot; devoid of life and all feelings. No one ever guessed what was going through that mind of his, no one ever knew what he was thinking or feeling. He looked like a normal teenager, and that was what everyone thought he was. Sad enough, that was exactly what he was not. A teenager; yes but definitely not normal.
Depression caught his coat tails and followed him wherever he went. Depression was his master, his superior and his demons. He never thought to fight it, but even when he did, he was weak. He did not have the strength nor the will to fight this demon till the end. Courageous as he was, he tried but gave up eventually.
Deceiving as appearance was, no one had any idea of what inner turmoils he had to go through. As all victims alike, it was almost a shame to admit that he had problems that he would rather keep it all to himself. Not wanting to burden those close to him, or maybe, it was just too hard to explain. Suffocating under the tight grasp of control this evil beast had, he learned to adapt to his situation.
Perhaps, he simply got too accustomed to the feel of depression, he became a victim; an addict to Depression. Needing to feel pain, wanting to feel hurt, craving to be alone. Clammed up in his own world, he leads a double life. The life that reigns supreme when he is alone and the other, the life where he constantly keeps up a convincing facade. For how long, I wonder, just how long can he last like that?
Even as he continues putting on the mask, acting out his scenes, he feels weary of what life has to offer. Depression is his drug; he could not wait to get to his other life. Gradually, he drifts away from his family and friends; the only sign of his normal life. He shuns those who care, he rejects the help of those that offer.
I think he is too jaded about life, or he is more sadistic than I thought. Afterall, I have gone through this phase of depression myself. Though such phases have decreased these days, it strikes me when I am unguarded. Hard as I have tried to shake free of this demon, at least I tried. Really hard. While sometimes I scored victories, certainly I have had my fair share of defeat. Still, I never forgot, who was my foe. As much anger or hate I might have had in me; regarding matters of the heart, academics, teachers, family and even friends, I never forgot which was my worse enemy.
Do not let that overheading darkness block out any ray of hope, any ray of faith. Do not continue to be that blind man, literally blind, groping in the life of darkness, unsure of where to go, what life to lead. Never let depression make you feel guilty of being happy. Happiness is a right due to anybody. Depression is naught. It is only an emotion, a demon, a bully, that strikes its victim when the victim is weak.
Be strong, hold onto your faith. Gruelling the process may be, you need to tough it all out. Time is the key factor in your success, but mind you to hold out till Time has done its work. Don't give up even before Time has finished its work with Depression. Don't give up on your ally, don't let yourself lose that advantage. Depression has to be fought. Not oppressed. Or to succumb into. Gather your courage and may God bless you.
♥ occasionally sane but mostly weird 4:09 pm.
Prelude
Annsley's words.
She tried to fall in love but failed.
She learned everything the hard way.
To be on top, you must sacrifice.
She's alone.
Putting distance between people and herself.
She's losing everyone.
Hell of a complicated girl.
Profile
A N N S L E Y there's nothing wrong with my name.
If you think you know me, read my blog and think again. I'm imperfect and I can't help it..
I'm the only witness and the only person who can judge my life.
This is my blog so I call the shots. Leave if you hate it.
announcements;p
